Through K's eye's

Well the way I saw this all.. at the start we were both looking to try and expand our sexual experiences.. I like to think I'm not your typical young horned up pervert. I regret that I was in my early to late teens. I learned alot since then and have grown. I've made mistakes and learned from them. Its true sex is great but its not the end of the world. With that said I'll get right down to the timeline of events as I saw it.

I met SG and Jack on AFF. I was mostly there to talk with friends that I had there (and no not for sexual interest, they were just good friends) and I admit if I was offered intimacy and if I liked the person I probably woulda accepted. As it stood I was in a chatty mood and talking to a bunch of people and saw this new couple log on. I said hello as I usually do to almost all females, couples and the males I know on there. I always felt like the bouncer of the room and the doorman lol I always said hello and took out the trash when it got bad enough. (Online people think they can get away with treating women like crap.. not for me!) anyways we exchanges the usual pleasantries.. how are you? plans for the evening, how things are going, which end of the couple was talking (both of them were fyi) and we generally hit it off fairly well. Now this room can get 50-80 people a night in there with everyone talking so I offered my msn to allow for better and non-rushed conversation they accepted and it went from there.

They liked what they read and saw and I did as well. As it stood my boss's had taken January off to goto mexico and I had enough money to tide me over till they got back. So I basically had ALOT of spare time on my hands. In that time SG and I spent alot of time together. Jack and I never. The odd weekend I visited them.. and went for wings once. Thats where I feel it went wrong. Jack from what I've seen can be very judgemental and closed off. Moreso then even myself which I thought nearly impossible. We never talked or bonded or anything really. So he never got to know me as SG did nor I of him, which is regretable. This was compounded by SG and I developing feelings for one another. As he didn't know me, he became worried about what I was doing. Was I trying to steal SG? Was I being ignorant to him?

Now from here on its my impression not the actual feelings and thoughts of Jack's feelings or thoughts. Mainly my beliefs and what I hear from outside sources.

As time progressed I think everything started swelling within Jack and he did not let it out so it remained bottled up until one day it all came out in a gushing torrent. Eventually I am sure he would have blown but as it stands we broke the same rule as before (B-control). We were foolish and I was selfish yes. I just feel we were comfortable enough with each other that when the heat of the moment came it wasn't important.. how wrong we were.. After a month of this with Jack and I barely talking SG needed time and space and went to spend the weekend at her friend V's place. During that saturday I tried talking to Jack.. he basically didn't want to talk so I said ok but I was here if he wanted to.. and after that he unloaded.. alot was insulting, some was true and well.. I took it in stride. I didn't know what to say but it was good that he unloaded.. I felt he needed to and so I didn't tell him to stop. Besides I could learn from what he said was wrong with me.

And so here we are now. What it all breaks down to me? We rushed in and were unprepared for the emotional turmoil to follow. I didn't expect this in the least. Jack likely didn't expect it to happen and I think SG was the only one relatively prepared as she knows herself really well. Lack of communication, no one knowing what the others were thinking, being judgemental.. and assuming to much compounded this all to this point. I was a circle being put into a box so to speak. Jack had a simple view of what this all was to do. SG was to go out and be intimate with random guys and experiment with them both. Well.. then I came along and well.. I learned alot.. and if it had not been me it would have been another.. as SG has a wonderfully big heart. She isn't one to have random sex jsut for the sake of having it. As you can tell in her blog she cannot have unemotional sex anymore. She simply has too big of a heart.

I'm not free and clear of this either.. but thats my take on it.. I should have tried to talk to Jack more at the start maybe. I'm not sure. I hope this answers your questions.